Motivates

This week marks ‘finals’ week at school. In some ways, the week is very sad for me. There are numerous students whom I have come to know over the past 12 weeks that I will miss. In other ways, finals come as a relief. There are several students whom are very dramatic and very wearing.

I did not write as much about school this quarter as I typically like. There have certainly been situations to write about, but I have not had the time and/or the desire. The past two weeks have been especially trying for me. As students’ stress increases towards the end of the quarter, so does mine. Students sometimes are no longer able to handle the pressure of balancing their personal lives with course demands. On occasion, the group projects, prospect of finals, papers, etc. all become too much for them to handle. Their stress manifests itself in different ways. Sometimes I notice it via a student’s absence in class. Sometimes I notice it via a decline in the quality of a person’s work. Sometimes the evidence of the person’s stress hits me like a ton of bricks as the student is before me either crying or yelling.

I think that fall quarter is a unique. The population of students that occupies the campus is different than that one may find during another quarter. There are the students whom recently graduated from high school and think that college is a scary place. These students tend to be so stressed out about being successful that they can barely function. There are the students who resent being on campus, but were told by their parents that they will either go to college or move out. In an effort to sponge for another year or two, the students will attend classes, but not take an active role in their educations. Then, there is the average student.

In the ideal situation, an instructor can balance a class. He or she can get the overstressed students to calm down and the slackers to ‘shape up or ship out’ within the first few weeks. Then those students, the ‘typical’ students, and the teacher can have some fun and get to learning. For whatever reason, I seemed to have a difficult time balancing my classes this quarter. I am not sure if this was due to the fact that my students were an especially eclectic bunch this quarter or if I was not focused enough due to my obligations outside of school.

Although, overall, I can report the quarter went well, I cannot help but think it could have gone better. If only I was more on top of my game, if only the slackers dropped, etc. I feel a responsibility to my students. I think that they should get their money’s worth. I think as they ruminate about the quarter, they should be able to confirm that they learned a lot and gained some insight into the world. If they cannot, I feel it is somehow an indication of my failure.

It is not abnormal for students to say goodbye to me at the end of the quarter. It is polite for students to say ‘thanks’ as they turn in their finals and walk away. When it does not happen, I am sensitive to the same – probably a little too sensitive. I wonder: Did that person get what he or she needed from this class? Will that student return next quarter? Is he or she better for being in this class? Did I have an impact on his or her life?

Although I certainly was not upset by it, I was surprised that more students did not say goodbye this quarter. It is true that I will have several of them again next quarter, but still……. I thought about the same as I opened my e-mail today.

Much to my surprise, I had numerous e-mails from students today. I thought, “Gosh, what can they want now? Certainly they’re not writing to complain about their grades. I have not even had a chance to look at the finals yet. Give me a break”. Yet, as I opened each message, they were all messages of gratitude – unsolicited positive feedback.

Their messages:

“I just wanted to say thanks for the great class you taught. I really did learn a lot and I appreciated your enthusiasm as a teacher. Having a teacher like you makes the whole experience more enjoyable. I hope I get to take another class that you teach some time in the future. I hope you get everything you want out of teaching and life”. – Student A

“I would like to thank you for being my instructor and opening up my mind. I hope our paths cross again in the near future. I don't have any plans to take another psychology class as I am trying to get all of my prerequisites out of the way to apply to the Dental Hygiene schools in my area-- however, you never know”. – Student B

“Thanks for everything this quarter. You have no idea how much I learned from you. I had fun learning it too. Your passion for being here is awesome. I hope all of my instructors will be like you. If I only had more teachers like you the first time around, I probably would’ve earned my degree 10 years ago. Thanks for making it easy for me to come back. I was afraid before. Now I know I can do well”. – Student C.

"I just wanted to say that I loved your class, and as of now it has been the best class I have ever taken. Although my test scores show that I have hardly learned a thing, I promise that they lie. I learned a ton in your class, and your lectures were awesome! never a dull moment. Just thought you should know I enjoyed your class.
It was great :)" - Student D.

Perhaps the quarter went a little bit better than I initially thought. Drama aside, it looks like I got through to a least a few students. For me, that is what this experience is all about.

This knowledge motivates me for next quarter.