Critiqued

The quarter is now in full swing. I have one class to add in a couple of weeks and then I will be at full capacity. I am busy. I am sometimes stressed. I'm challenged. Despite it all, I am doing well.

In addition to the numerous classes I am teaching, I also serve as a student in two classes this quarter as well. These courses are not ones that I've looked forward to. In fact, one of the professors appears so anal that it makes me anxious. The other is so lax that it also induces a certain level of anxiety. The amount of work that is required of each course is a bit mind-boggling. The topics of each are not particularly interesting to me either. Each class requires me to submit video-taped demonstrations of my work to be critqued publicly by others - a task I rather just avoid, thank you very much. When entering the quarter I thought to myself, "Just do it. Get through this and move on with your life". While that remains the basic goal, I am surprised by my additional reactions to the class thus far. I feel incredibly supported by my supervisors. My confidence regarding my ability is growing as I receive others' feedback. My skills are improving as others ask me poignant questions as well.

Despite the great start to an intense quarter, I have realized over the past few weeks that being an instructor myself handicaps me as a student. I have high expectations for my instructors. I know how diligent I am in this role and expect no less from professors. I expect to see their efforts in improving my knowledge. I expect them to be responsive, articulate, and inspiring. When they are less than stellar, it is obvious to me. I quickly become frustrated.

Thus, it seems that this quarter will not just be about theory, the refinement of skills, and typical assignments, but will also be an exercise of patience.

Yay for personal growth!