Satisfaction

My company moved facilities last week. Today was my first day in the new building and to my office. Actually -- correction-- to my new cubicle. I have not shared an office in several years and prior to today had never experienced "cubicle life".

In all honesty, I do not really care if I have an office or a cubicle. I no longer supervise anyone thus I do not need to be concerned with maintaining my employees' privacy. I prefer e-mail over all other modes of communication and thus do not really require privacy for phone calls either, as I rarely use the same. I have an exceptional ability to tune others out (you have to when teaching freshmen) and am therefore not too worried about all of the commotion likely to occur in our area. Chances are I'll actually benefit from the same, as I find silence distracting. In all honesty, my biggest concern regarding cubicle life is the fact that I am a slob at work. I like to spread out. I have piles of paper everywhere. My desk typically looks like a tornado just passed through, but that is the way I like it. I can find everything. I doubt others will really like looking at the same.

Typically when I change offices, I try to make the new space "mine". I place my favorite quotes on the wall, hang my favorite posters, and place a photo or two on my desk. I have a decent selection of music available as well. This time, however, something is different. I have no desire to hang pictures. I am not concerned with the decorations on the walls. In short, aside from the wide array of Sharpies and flourescent post-its in the top drawer of my desk, there is no evidence of my presence.

I told J of my behavior related to our move. He confirmed that my behavior, although mostly insignificant, is rather odd for me. He also commented that he noticed I brought home most of my personal effects a few weeks ago. He said, "I think you're done there. Maybe this is your sign". In essence, he thinks I do not like my job and want to leave. I do not think he is correct.

It is true that my current day job does not make my heart go pitter-patter. I do not wake up each day excited to start on my commute. I do not smile at the prospect of completing my daily tasks. I do not dislike the job though either. In many ways, it is perfect to for me. I am not responsible for others (or at least I am not supposed to be). I have a fabulous schedule. I answer to few. I work at my own pace. I can pay my mortgage. The position relies on a few of my strengths: I must be able to write a coherent sentence now and again. I must be able to effectively communicate with others. I must rely on common sense. I must be persistent. I must not accept a solution because it is the easy thing to do. I must, at times, be a hard ass.

I think about job satisfaction a lot. What is "job satisfaction"? Is it having the ability to leave work at work? Is it feeling good about making it through the day? Is it the piece of mind that comes with knowing one has made an effort to have the ability to pay his or her bills? Is it possible to be satisfied with one's job even if he or she is not passionate about it?

Why is it that I do not find myself making my space my own? What is the deal?